Taking a cue from Slyvester Stallone's mother, Jackie, who claims to be a rumpologist as well as an astrologer, Psychic Vera tried her hand at analyzing rumps she perused on the astral plane.

Claiming that her newly learned technique was embarrassing to practice, Vera said, "Thank God I don't have to consult with individuals on the physical level. It's easy enough to tune into their derrieres on the psychic plane without them being the wiser."

She went on to relate how she had learned quite a bit about Newt Gingrich by analyzing his bum. Citing privacy issues, Vera says she is keeping secret the exact physical characteristics of the rump in question which can be indicative of facets of the personality. She did say,however, that "the creases denote that Newt has a noose around his neck and the rope is his estranged wife. Mrs. Gingrich's lawyers are going to depose Newt and ask him embarrassing questions about the adulterous affair he has been having for the past several years."

Other characteristics of Newt's rearend support the notion that he is not very constant in love. While recently carrying on an affair with a young woman almost half his age while married to his second wife, he was guilty of other peccadillos while married to his first. According to Vanity Fair Magazine, he was seen having sex in a car with a neighbor while his first wife was at a block party.

Relying on Stallone's mother's description, Psychic Vera revealed that each buttock represented the left and right hemispheres of the brain. The right hemisphere of the brain rules the intuitive function and the left side. Thus Newt's left buttock indicates that he is overly imaginative and living in a dream world that he believes is reality. In other words, he makes up facts and believes them to be true.

"Newt is particularly unrealistic about himself," Vera noted. He believes he is a gorgeous hunk of man, when in actuality he's a glib, unappealing chatterbox."

Psychic Chuck, Vera's husband, is not supportive of her new system, even though it does reveal some facets of character. He believes rumpology is a dead end, and that the only reason Slyvester Stallone's mother started studying this part of the human body was because her son is such an ass.